


enough

by chili_aux



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Drunk Hange, F/M, Female Hange Zoë, Fluff, Humor, Oblivious Levi, Other, Sawney and Bean as cats, Slight Sexual Innuendos, Too much cursing, cheating?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-18
Updated: 2021-02-18
Packaged: 2021-03-13 11:55:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,675
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29526030
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chili_aux/pseuds/chili_aux
Summary: Hange and Levi's smooth-sailing relationship suddenly becomes strained when Levi started to exhibit strange behaviours, making Hange doubt the love they shared for years.
Relationships: Levi Ackerman & Hange Zoë, Levi Ackerman/Hange Zoë, Nanaba/Mike Zacharias
Comments: 29
Kudos: 125





	enough

**Author's Note:**

> A new fic after a long time lol. University just occupied me too much this past month. *Getting tired of it already* 
> 
> Anyway, this is honestly just self-indulgent again. Forgive me in advance for OOC tendencies. I think it's cliche, too. So, if you don't like cliches, it's okay for me :)) If you still stayed, can I give you a hug? Lol. I hope you will enjoy! 
> 
> Beware: Lots of cursing ahead.

While sitting on their white smooth sofa, Hange is reading a book that tells about a man and a woman who fought a war together that both broke them and taught them lessons about love, life, and tragedy. Finally reaching the last chapter, she was glad that the couple had survived the battle, and now manifesting their promise to live together in a wide, quiet, and secluded greenery forest.

Hange cannot help but compare herself to the woman though. Despite being strong, she still suffered quite an amount of times throughout the story, physically, mentally, and emotionally. It was bittersweet; the man she fell in love with had grown quite a relationship with another woman when she had been far from him due to her duties. She relates with the woman in more ways than one, facing a similar situation currently that she does not know why and how it has begun in the first place.

A sound of shuffling disrupted Hange from her thoughts. Leaving the untouched page of the book, she glanced up to the source of the sound. Dressed in a sleek black suit and unsoiled leather shoes, Levi is fixing his grey tie while simultaneously arranging his things inside his suitcase.

Hange just watched him silently, her hand unconsciously closes the book. After one more scuffling of his sleeve, Levi briefly glanced at her and walked towards the sofa.

"Bye, Hange. I'm going to be back by 12. Sleep early and don't forget to eat, okay?" Levi hurriedly said before kissing her on the forehead and scrambled his way to their mahogany door. Hange's eyes just followed his every movement, staring at his back with an unreadable expression.

The door closed with a bang, signalling that Levi left without letting her talk again. Little did Levi knows; a trail of boiling doubt was left behind his footsteps – a trail that can be traced back to Hange's tired and worn-out self.

 _How many times did this happen again?_ Hange already lost count from the fifth time.

 _How long is this happening? Is it weeks? Is it months now?_ She really does not know the answer to that set of questions.

Hange was never one to doubt her partner with regards to relationship-related problems. When she engaged herself with this type of relationship, her trust, love, and loyalty are all out in the open. The choice to take care of it all was left to the one she had offered it with.

And this time, it was Levi.

Levi, who is her best friend since the day they met at their kindergarten's playground at the age of 5. Hange remembered that Levi declined her offer to play at first, saying that he might collect dirt and another bunch of bacterias inside his fingernails. Eventually though, with her incessant bribing of ice cream, pushing, and showing off of her cute toothy grin to the stoic child, they finally made a sandcastle with Levi not minding the grains of sand entering said fingernails.

Levi, who is her constant companion in her whole academic days. Hange remembered the mornings Levi would kick her butt to wake her up for school because she slept late again. She also recalled the afternoon breaks she spent in the library with Levi sitting and either sleeping or reading beside her, while she just reads random science books that managed to capture her interest. She also reminisced the nights they spent at each other’s rooms, holed up in a thick futon during reviews as preparation for upcoming exams. 

Levi, who loves to call her nicknames that will make others grimaced when they hear it. Shitty Glasses and Four Eyes? Quite insulting at first, but Hange is not the type of person to be easily offended like that. She even welcomed it with wide-open arms, returning the favor to the tiniest man she let inside her bubbly life. The retorts, insults, and constant bickering had become a routine that she treasures and etches in her memory every time it occurs.

Levi, who is the reason for their first major fight as friends that eventually catalyzed them to be in a relationship. Hange totally did not expect it, that Levi is the main cause of the absence of men trying to pursue her. It made her quite insecure, thinking that maybe her intelligence made her intimidating. _Or she isn’t pretty enough to be seen as a woman._ But no, Levi was going behind her back, stopping every man who will show even a tiny ounce of interest towards her. It made her angry when she found out about it through Moblit, the first man that confessed to her. During the confrontation, she anticipated that it might just be some kind of poop jokes that Levi always pulls out on her. Hange's totally mistaken. Damn, the man shut her angry ramblings by stealing her first kiss. She just stood there – dumbfounded – but afterwards, she just laughed it all up. She didn't take Levi to do something cliché and out of character, but she fathomed, love and affection make people do something out of their comfort bounds.

Despite this reminiscing involving the man she loves with her all; the familiar and nostalgic happiness did not visit Hange like it always used to. The memories just push her down to the void of darkness and loneliness – the dim surrounding makes it hard to find the light to this never-ending gloom. As much as she wants to get up and force herself to approach whatever solution she could find, any movement makes her quiver, every breath she takes weakens her.

 _‘Hange, this is not you. Wake the fuck up,”_ she continuously tells herself.

Her intrusive thoughts are making her heart clenched in an insurmountable amount of pain. Just thinking about Levi, her Levi, doing something that she does not want to elaborate more brings her agony tantamount to that of a fall from an endless pit.

Hange snapped out of her reverie when she felt something rub on both of her legs. Looking down, she saw her two cute chubby felines, staring at her with their big dolly baby blue eyes – Sawney and Bean. Her mind travelled to the past again, back to when Hange and Levi saw these two beautiful creatures and decided to keep them forever.

It was a rainy day with nimbus clouds hovering above them all afternoon. Levi fetched her from her work because “I do not want puddles on the floor because you fucking forgot to change your shoes.” She just knows that the raven-haired man is being a tsundere again.

Upon reaching their home, however, they were stopped from entering the door by cries of kittens. They looked around to find its source only to find a small box containing two kittens with fur as white as snow and eyes as deep as the blue sea. Hange cannot help but coo by the cuteness the furry babies possessed.

Levi, who grew silent as he watched the whole exchange, knew what's going to happen next. When Hange glanced back at Levi's indifferent form, any argument went down the drain as the woman's chocolate orbs – filled with glee and anticipation – bored at him. The man just sighed because arguing about keeping it was futile. Since then, their small apartment was littered with laughter, love, and smelly cat poops that made Levi vomit once.

A burst of dry laughter erupted from her chest. _Fuck stop it already, Hange._

Hange shook her head in an attempt to remove those memories in her mind. She wonders where that laughter and love went though. The household’s old warmth and noise were now lost.

_Will it ever come back? Will Levi come back?_

A soft meow interrupted her again. This time, Sawney went up to the sofa beside her and rub his head to her arm. She transferred her gaze to Bean and motioned the feline to get up, too – which the cat followed immediately. She spent the next minutes in silence, the book she’s reading before was now laid on the coffee table, forgotten and might never be opened again.

For reasons unknown, Bean suddenly relocated to Sawney’s side. They sat side by side, just briefly staring at each other, then looking at her in unison. Hange knew what the cats are doing for this happened countless times before. This weirded Levi and Hange out at first though. A couple of cats communicating through eye contact was not on their list of cat owning’s beware and all that jazz. They just got used to it eventually, still not understanding what entirely was happening because of the lack of specific pattern.

In this case, though, Hange had an inkling of the cats' thoughts. It just might be her imagination – but it seems like her pets had a hunch on the current events in her life. Mirroring the concern that the cats' eyes are showing to her, adding it with a bit of fake assurance, she softly said, "I'm fine. There's nothing to be worried about."

 _Damn, even to the cats, I’m lying._ Hange begrudgingly thought.

In the constant and recent absences of Levi in this small but comfy apartment of theirs, she is forever grateful to these two creatures for keeping her company. Without them, she might have totally gone insane from this whole ordeal.

Hange just let out a shaky breath, sorrowful tears are brimming and pooling her brown orbs. But she does not let it out. No, this is not her. The Hange that she knows would not let herself be stomped like this. She is an eccentric and fearsome woman, intuitive at best. When she sensed that something is wrong, she will act on it – but not long before thinking of what the best action could be first.

_Now, where does that Hange went?_

Closing her eyes, Hange took a deep breath, an act to momentarily calm the storm bruising inside her chest. It did nothing but make her involuntarily shudder by the numerous emotions surging and swaying her heart. Nevertheless, she still opened up her eyes and gazed at her cute pets again, “Well, a certain shorty said that I should eat. Do you want treats?”

Couples of mews were their replies which made her lips stretched in a small smile. “Then, treats it is.”

Hange spent the rest of the night playing games with her furry felines, at the same time avoiding any thought of a particular raven-haired man. She also cleaned every dust and dirt that she can see, hoping that when Levi gets home - a desperate plea, she knows - will capture the attention of the man she loves.

She laid in her bed that night, staring at her ceiling. The darkness is slowly consuming her again – the dim light of the lamp beside their bed was just a mere glow in her gloomy sight. As the moon sunk low and leaves rustle by the transient wind, Hange succumbed to another peaceless sleep, facing away from the side where Levi shall be sleeping in.

When hours after midnight comes, however, a movement from their bedroom’s door interrupted her sleep. Levi comes back, but she continued to play pretend – not wanting to open her eyes and see something she won’t like. But Hange forgot that there exists another sense in her body. When she felt Levi snaked an arm around her waist and kissed her temple gently, Hange suppressed the tears and the pained whimpers that are pleading to come out.

As Levi slept beside Hange that night, unusually unwashed and unchanged from his work clothes to his sleepwear, the smell of faint vanilla coming from the man haunted Hange for the rest of the night.

* * *

In the morning, Hange left the house with a still asleep Levi. She does not bother to wake him up because she thinks she cannot bear to face and interact with the man yet without finally lashing out at him. She does not want the confrontation to be surged by emotions – despite this being just wishful thinking that is so unlike Hange. She just realized that they are both adults that both can talk things out maturely and civilly. If she can keep her feelings in check, it may be possible. _She hopes so._

Entering the floor where her office is located, Hange immediately spotted her best friend, Nanaba – the only person who has the full knowledge of what is happening. She strides faster to the blonde girl and grabs her immediately to an isolated hallway near their department's pantry.

"Hey, Hange! Wait!" Letting go of her best friend's arm once reaching their destination, Hange finally let the tears begging to be released since the night before. Facing the heaving woman, the unbidden tears fell like water in an endless stream. Worry immediately painted Nanaba's face.

Nanaba immediately wrapped her arms around Hange, rubbing the latter’s back as comfort, “Oh, babe. Shh. I’m here okay? Just let it all out.”

“I- I don’t know what to do now, Nana. I think last night was my last straw.”

“What happened?”

Hange took a deep breath first before telling everything that occurred last night. Nanaba stayed silent for the whole session. After a few quiet moments, the blonde woman finally spoke up.

“Maybe you should talk it out to him already, Hans. Your assumptions may be wrong or – as much as I don’t want to say – right, the only way to know is by telling him what’s running on your mind these past weeks.” Nanaba softly said.

She hugged her blonde friend once more as Hange felt the tears pooling in her eyes again. Nanaba welcomes her, "Remember that I'm always here for you, 'kay? If you need help moving out of that house, my home will always welcome you." 

"Thank you, Nanaba," Hange replied incomprehensibly. She suddenly felt a gentle tap on her lower back, which she took as a sign to let go. Nanaba erupted in laughter after removing her face from the blonde's neck. Hange just laughed, too. "I looked like a mess, didn't I?"

“Hmm. Now, let’s fix ourselves. We don’t want bushy eyebrows sending us memos, right?”

After hours of burying herself in a pile of paperwork, an attempt to occupy herself with fleeting busyness, lunchtime finally came. Hange can feel her stomach grumble, making her remember that she didn't eat something for breakfast, too.

 _‘If Levi found out about that, that shorty will be fuming again.’_ Hange unconsciously said in her mind. Her eyes widen when she realized what she did, shaking her head rapidly afterwards. She must have shaken it too much because her head ached after.

“If I don’t know you, I might mistake you for that ugly bopping head display Mike has in his car.” Turning, she found Nanaba approaching her office table.

“If I don’t know you, I might mistake that you don’t know what’s up and down. Oh, you don’t know.” Hange instantly retorted.

“Hey, foul! And that’s just one-time, fucking hangover.”

“Oh yeah? Dude, even if I’m in a heavy hangover, I won’t press the elevator’s down button and not the up button when I’m still in the basement the whole time.”

“Hey, if not for that party of yours and that Satan chibi, I won’t- “Nanaba suddenly paused, realizing that she accidentally mentioned he-who-must-not-be-named, “Okay, let’s stop there.” 

Hange's beautiful face lost its gleam from that short teasing session, an image of the man she loved appeared inside her mind, clenching her chest yet again. In an attempt to mask her true feelings, she just smiled at the blonde woman's guilty face and said, "So, where will we eat?"

“Ahem, to the cafeteria? I don’t want to go out since I still have many files to do.” Nanaba carefully said.

Hange just nodded her head and fixed her office table, got her wallet and phone, and saved her work progress for the meantime. While walking, she opened her phone for the first time that day. She ignored her lock screen picture that instantly brought beautiful but unwanted memories of her first trip overseas with Levi. After typing the passcode, she checked her messages if she received one from the raven-haired man. She just smiled sarcastically when she found… none.

_What did I expect? Pathetic, Hange._

Upon reaching the cafeteria, however, all her efforts to forget the man for that day went down to the brim. Levi, dressed handsomely in his white button-down shirt and black pants, is sitting comfortably on one of the tables. Just seeing him makes her heart tightened more than it ever did.

_If he’s already here, why did he not inform me?_

However, while going nearer, they were stopped when a woman suddenly sat beside Levi, placing the tray of food she has gracefully before offering a smile to the raven-haired man. Hange’s brown orbs widened when Levi, her stoic Levi, returned it with a rare gentle smile.

Hange truly and unquestionably recognizes that smile for she's always at the receiving end of that during the years that they are together. She remembered how she was swept by her feet when Levi showed it to her, albeit, unconsciously. Every fleeting moment of that smile was thoroughly tattooed in her memory lane laid especially for Levi.

Now, it seems like the man found another receiver of that preciously rare expression of his, namely, Petra Ral. She felt dumbfounded by the scene unravelling in front of her, how they are so sweetly close to each other despite the large spaces left beside them. She felt her world crashed as to how they seemed to lock themselves inside this bubble that only the two of them are allowed to break in.

As she clenched her shaking hands, she can feel her tears threatening to fall again but before those watery pain fell through her stony face, Hange repressed it. She had enough, totally had enough. The number of tears she allowed to stream from her brown orbs during this whole ordeal was sufficient to last her for this lifetime.

_Enough of being a weak-ass bitch, Hange._

Swallowing every bit of emotion raiding inside her, she glanced at Nanaba whose face donning the similar expression that she has. Sensing her look and the tenseness that Hange is suppressing, she coldly said, “Let’s get out of here. Fuck paperwork, you’re more important than them.”

As they stroll farther away from the pair, Hange did not know why she even glanced back, she never takes herself as a masochist, but she did… and she regrets it terribly. The memory lane filled with all the delightfully wonderful moments she made with the raven-haired man is now painted with Levi tucking Petra’s hair behind her ear as the girl eats her meal, with the girl’s laughter that resonates thereafter as the background music that poisoned her ears incessantly, and with Levi looking away from the girl with slight pink blush coating his usually apathetic face.

* * *

When the sun sunk low into the depth of the horizon, two women sat side by side in a red leather sofa inside the bar not far from their office. Bottles of alcoholic beverages laid unorganized with a certain bespectacled woman continuously pouring the contents on her godforsaken broken heart.

“A-am I not e-enough for him, Nana?!” Hange shouted at the top of her lungs, never minding the few heads that turned at the sound of her shrilling voice. Her arms, which grew numb over every passing minute of vigorous drinking, exaggeratedly flail in different directions before slamming hard on the table where she laid her pounding drunk head.

Nanaba, who just silently watched her friend with alert but concerned eyes, just slowly rubbed Hange’s back as she cried for the nth time that night. She knows that interrupting a sad Hange in her drunk stupor wouldn’t go very well. This is much better than the Hange who bottles her emotions up in the past weeks.

Nanaba _hates_ seeing her in that state.

Her trail of thinking was stopped when Hange suddenly lifted her head up and grabbed her seventh bottle of alcohol for the night. Nanaba shook her head briefly and swore under her breath that that will be the last bottle her miserable friend will drink. As the woman gulped all the substance up, she secretly gets her phone inside of her pocket and sneakily texted _someone._

Returning the phone safely, Nanaba turned her attention to her friend again who’s now laying her head on the back of their occupied sofa, mouth hanging open and continuously mumbling soft incomprehensible noises. Her friend doesn’t deserve to be in this dejected state. Hange and miserable in one sentence sounds foreign to Nanaba’s ears. She might never say this out loud, but she misses the loud, eccentric Hange that immediately announced that she is her friend when they first met.

Even though Nanaba hates what her friend is currently going through, she cannot ignore the nagging thought running in her mind ever since all these messes began. It’s never listed in Nanaba’s personality and character traits to take sides when she’s in the middle of stressing situation, like this one.

_They are yet to hear Levi’s side._

It’s not as if she is invalidating her friend’s feelings though, it’s just that she constantly recites in her head these lawful words: _Not guilty unless proven otherwise_. She’s not a fucking lawyer for fuck’s sake. It’s just basic human decency to give reasonable doubt to persons involved in various type of situations such as this.

She was interrupted from her thoughts again when Hange suddenly called her, “Nanaba?”

“Hmm, what is it, bubu?” She scooted closer to the brunette.

The bespectacled woman turned to her, making her worry surges more as a streak of tear rolled down Hange’s sullen face. What the brunette said next just pained Nanaba more than she ever experienced.

_“What did I do for him to get tired of me, Nana? What should I do to be better? Should I clean my mess up now? Take a bath regularly? Or should I wish to a genie to shorten my height? What’s wrong with me, Nana? Am I really not enough?”_

Nanaba is never prepared for the next though.

_“Or should I break up with him so he can finally be with Petra? Levi’s happiness is the most important to me, Nana. If he can be happy with another woman, then I will let him go.”_

Despite the loud noises surrounding them, combined with the colorful blinding lights passing through their eyesight, Nanaba can feel the Hange’s agony through her painful words. As much as she wants to help her suffering friend, she knows only one person can do the helping – or in this case, the waking.

As if on cue, a looming figure appeared on her peripheral, his presence dominating every person he passed by. The crowd in front of them parted giving way to the man, Levi Ackerman. Behind him is Mike, Nanaba’s boyfriend, who just looked her straight in the eye to tell her that he did his job correctly. She just nods with this and transferred her gaze again to Levi, as he silently approached her mess of a best friend.

"She's really drunk, Levi. Be careful." Nanaba softly said. The man just nodded without removing his steel-blue eyes from Hange, staring intently as if the woman might suddenly disappear from his sight. From the outsider's perspective, Levi might appear irritated or indifferent to Hange but just by being their friends for years, Nanaba and Mike know that a storm of concern and apprehension is circulating inside the stoic man.

An aggravating silence stretched in the area, unnerving despite the loud music playing in the background. It was broken by Levi Ackerman himself.

“Why did four-eyes here drink her ass off again? And without even telling me, huh, Nanaba?” She cannot help but feel angry with this jab from the shorty.

 _‘Why don’t you ask yourself, midget?’_ Nanaba wanted to retort back.

Taking a deep breath and carefully picking her words, Nanaba slowly answered, “I guess, you better bring her home first and wait for her to sober up. Hange… will then tell you.”

She can see how Levi’s shoulders stiffen by this – that even in his stony façade, just a mere say of Hange’s name is enough to make that man nervous. They were interrupted by the subject of the conversation herself though.

“Hey! I am sobeeer! I’mmm the schoberest woooman in this fuckin’ plasceee!” Hange suddenly exclaimed with exaggeratedly pointing to herself.

“She’s slurring now, Levi.”

"Oi, shitty glasses." Levi stepped nearer to Hange. The brunette somehow managed to catch the gaze of the man – however with difficulty with face scrunched with confusion – a sign that she might not have recognized the man in front of her. Nanaba was proven right when Hange, as if Levi wasn't standing in front of her, suddenly glanced at her again – lifting the bottle she is still holding to the blonde woman.

“I-I n-need another shot of thisshh, Nana.” The brunette said, pouting.

“No Hans, you had enough.”

She stood up and attempted to get the bottle out of her friend’s tight grip. Hange, however, persevered. “N-no! It’ch not! You tascchhe it, right? It shooo good yet…” With an unbelievable force, the bottle she’s tugging from Hange’s hand was pulled near to the bespectacled woman’s face, then Hange rubs her face on the bottle’s surface before continuing in a small, barely hearable voice. “… too schmall. I really do looove schtrong and schmall schtuff.”

Nanaba just facepalmed. _Of all the descriptions, Hange?_ However, the woman isn’t finished yet.

 _“But! But my schtroong and schmall schtuff doesn’t love me, right Nana?”_ Hange said in a much smaller voice, which she is totally grateful for because the strong shorty stuff apparently doesn’t hear it.

She was mistaken when Levi finally snapped out of his trance and finally closed the distance between him and his drunk girlfriend. His face was stoic as ever but Nanaba hunched that Levi is now picking the pieces and forming theories of why Hange is acting the way she is.

“Four eyes, let’s go home now.” Levi lowly said, easily getting the bottle from Hange’s hand and uncaringly putting it down to the table. Hange predictably complained – for such an intoxicated woman, she is quite strong. Levi is stronger though; the man carefully but firmly grasps Hange’s arms and loops them around his neck – effortlessly carrying the woman bridal style, wary not to let her slips from his arms.

"Where're her things?" Levi asked when Hange is finally secured in his hold.

“Here. I’ll bring them.” The man just nodded and began their journey to the parking lot.

After gathering their belongings, Nanaba just stared straight at Mike’s eyes, nodding at each other briefly before following their friends. If they were in another situation, the pair would have laughed at the display in front of them – a drunk Hange thrashing and punching Levi who was miraculously able to deflect and avoid every throw and jab at him.

“Hey, stop, shitty glasses! Fuck!” Reaching the parking lot, Levi looked back at Mike and gestured by his head to open the car which the latter followed immediately but was stopped when Hange had another round of her drunken chaos.

“Nooooo! Don’t wannaaaaa! My Leviiii will be angry if I…” she pointed herself, before pointing at Levi’s chest, too, “let chu take me homeeee. Ohhh wait, wait,” Hange suddenly looked up as if she remembered something. With eyes glassy from unshed tears and face stretched in a painful smile – she turned her attention back to Levi and said, “…well, my Levi won’t be angwy ‘cuz he’s alwayssss not there anywayyy, shooo you can take me home, hehe.”

Then, Hange finally silenced, burying her face on the crook of Levi’s neck. As Hange’s soft snore echoed through the parking lot, she was drunkenly oblivious to the catastrophe she unleashed around her.

All of their eyes widen at her statement, bewilderment and uneasiness are evident in their expressions. However, Nanaba and Mike absolutely know that among the three of them, Levi is the most affected of all.

They saw how he bowed his head while staring intently at the now sleeping woman in his arms, how his shoulders stiffened as tension rises up inside him, and how his grip around Hange tightened with his hands shaking considerably. What they don’t know, however, is the extent of the damage Hange’s sozzled statement brought to Levi.

With each passing second that the man stayed immobile and quiet, the pair cannot help but sweat nervously, their hearts pounding loudly inside their chests. As much as they want to talk, they cannot help but just stood there, rigid and standstill while waiting for Levi to say something. As the night breeze sweeps coolly at the parking lot, its coldness cannot match the frigid voice Levi possessed as he finally broke the shivering silence.

“Open the door now, Mike. I’ll take Hange home.”

Mike immediately obliged, while Nanaba is contemplating something. With a brief glance from Mike, she decided that there’s no turning back.

While Levi fixed Hange on the passenger seat, Nanaba slowly walked closer. Sensing another presence behind them, Levi spoke up without removing his steel-blue eyes from his woman, "What now?"

With deep breaths, Nanaba stated, “Perhaps, you already had a guess on what is happening with Hange. And I know I’m not in the position to say anything about this, but please, listen to everything she wants to say. Answer her questions honestly because fuck, I don’t want to see my friend like that again. And please, as much as it pains you, let her decides what she wishes after.” _Even if it’s letting her go._ Nanaba wanted to add.

She saw how Levi’s grip in the car’s door constricted, the hand softly removing Hange’s hair away from her face paused. After a moment of silence, she saw how Levi briefly nodded with blue eyes still not leaving the sleeping woman.

Sensing that the one-sided conversation is now over, Mike walked behind his girlfriend and put his calloused hands on her shoulder, “Come on, babe. Let’s go, too. Levi, take care of her.”

“Tch. You didn’t have to tell me that.”

After giving Hange’s things and just watching as the man swiftly drove from the parking space to the long and winding road leading to their home, the pair just wished that everything regarding those two will eventually fall into place.

* * *

Hange, as expected, woke up with a throbbing head. The blinding sunlight coming from their opened window makes it more difficult.

‘ _Fucking hangover, I’ll never drink again.’_ Hange thought.

With pillow upon her face serving as a shield from the sunlight, she reached for their bedside drawer and searched for her glasses. During the search though, questions swirl inside her mind, making her head pounded more.

 _‘How did I get here? Who brought me home? Is it Nanaba? Did Levi get home last night? Or is he with Petra? Fuck, why am I hurting myself? When will you stop, Hange?’_ she unstoppably recited, the desire to smash her pumping head against their headboard invaded her. Her intrusive thoughts were thankfully ceased when her hand managed to grab what she is searching for.

Now seeing clearly, she sat up and observed herself, founding that she was in her sleepwear – concluding that someone indeed takes her home last night. Hange somehow had a guess on who it is but she doesn't want to get her hopes up. She _had_ enough.

Lifting her still pounding head, she now observed her surroundings. Nothing has changed except for the teacup sitting safely atop their table not far from the bed. As much as she doesn’t want to acknowledge it, hope arises inside her chest.

“So, he’s here, huh?” Hange muttered to herself.

As if on cue, the door of their bedroom suddenly opened, making her heart and head thumped in a similar rhythm. Levi, garbed in his usual grey plunging long-sleeved shirt and black pyjamas, entered with hands occupied with a tray filled with porcelain ceramics for what she suspected was prepared for her.

Diverting her eyes away from the man, Hange just sat there unmoving, impassive. She doesn’t want to look at him while her mind is continuously replaying the aggravating scene she saw yesterday. She knows herself, either she will lash out at him and finally express the thoughts bothering her for weeks or she will once again weaken with just a mere sight of his stare. Either way, she absolutely won't like it. _Be civil, Hange._ She said to herself.

Even if she was not looking, the hairs on her nape are rising up as said stare is now directed at her, piercing. Lump forms in her throat, nervous pulse intensifying, head ceaselessly pounding. Footsteps went nearer and nearer; thump matching the beat inside her chest. As Levi puts down the tray in front of her, her ears wept with joy when it finally heard the velvety voice they terribly missed.

“Hange.” The man is now sitting beside her, his cool minty breath brushed against her bare neck. She wants to run away, distanced herself from the man but at the same time, she wants to wrap herself with Levi’s balminess that she had been deprived of in the past weeks. She stayed mute, both not knowing what to say and not wanting to talk.

“I brought you breakfast, it’s chicken soup. Eat now before it gets cold.” Levi lowly said. She looked down at the tray and silently watched as the man opened the lid containing said soup, allowing its delicious aroma to penetrate her senses and making her stomach grumbles. If she’s in another situation, she and Levi would have erupted in laughter at how loud it is. Instead, it just made her miss the moments Levi rarely do this to her – moments where they were still happy and this wall between them still ceases to exist.

Without any complaints though, she still grabs the spoon lying beside the soup's bowl and slowly digs it into the soup. Even if she's angry at Levi, she cannot let this precious food go to waste. While eating, however, she can feel the unwavering and piercing stare of the man as she eats which makes her wonder if he is even blinking. She paid him no mind, even if her neck aches with just looking in one direction.

Hange’s quiet eating session was stopped when she felt tender fingers holding her hair, slowly putting it behind her ear. Her eyes widened, and instinctively slaps the man’s hand away from her – the scene from the cafeteria instantly flashes inside her mind. Even if she isn’t looking, she can sense how the man is in utmost shock from what she did.

“U-umm, sorry. I’m done now, thank you.” After hastily but carefully removing the tray, she hurriedly scrambled her way to the bathroom. She was not successful with this though when a firm tight grip wrapped around her arm and made her face him. She saw how his eyes fumed with confusion; expression scrunched as if he is also hurt by whatever is happening between them. Looking away from the steel blue pools, Hange’s heart constricted from indescribable pain.

“What the fuck, Hange?!" Levi exploded, the hand holding her was shaking and tightening. Hange whimpered, suppressing the words that are already begging to come out, like a magma boiling below deep trenches up to the point that it erupted from its years of frustration.

“Look at me! Talk to me, Hange! What’s making you shit your pants again, huh?! What the fuck is wrong with you?!”

“No, what the fuck is wrong with you?!” The magma finally rose up, coloring her cheeks from the sudden outburst of repressed painful anger. _Fuck being civil._ Hange told herself.

“Do you really not know what is happening to me, Levi?! To us?! For weeks, for long fucking weeks, I tried to understand you! Why you rarely go home! Why you won’t even sit and talk to me! Why you will just leave without even telling me where the fuck you’ll go! I keep telling myself, maybe you’re just very busy about your work or whatever shit like that! But what the fuck Levi?! Just so you know, I’m a human too and I’m getting tired of this bullshit!”

With shock-broadened steel blue eyes, Levi’s mouth went agape, an unusual surprise stretching his face. Speechlessly standstill, he just stared at Hange as she heaved deep breaths from her outburst with red-painted angry blush pigmenting her cheeks. But Hange _isn’t_ done yet.

Stepping away from the raven-haired man, she removed his grasp from her arm and bowed her head, with hands closed in a tight fist, she continued – voice weak and trembling, “A-and, if you’re not happy with me since you already found another woman that can bring you more happiness, can you just- so just… just let me go, will you?”

A domineering and deafening silence followed, combined with palpitating nervousness, a bead of sweat runs down on her temple. She cannot bear to look up and see the eyes that she still loves so much – eyes that she will surely miss after all these messes are over. Seconds, minutes passed by, but they are still just standing opposite of each other – Levi is yet to speak. Hange, however, cannot take it anymore.

Brown orbs lifting up, she saw Levi in a similar stance, hands shaking from what Hange suspected as rage from being found out. _You’re the one who really had the guts to be angry, Levi?_ Hange thought but she cannot bear to speak it up.

Clearing her strained throat, she destroyed the tensive stillness, voice laced with indifference and an odd amount of care, maybe love. “I’ll take that as a yes, Levi. Thank you for everything, for the years of friendship and relationship. I hope that… I hope that you’ll finally be happy with Petra- “

“What the fuck?! Petra?! What does Petra have to do with this?! And fucking stop right there, Shitty Glasses!” Levi finally snapped, startling her too much that she is caught off guard for what happens next. The man grabbed her arm again and pulled her close, with another arm tightly wrapping around her waist, “Who said that I’m letting you go?!”

“What the?! Levi, let go, Shorty Clean Freak!” Trying her best to escape, she punched Levi’s shoulder repeatedly, “And don’t act like you don’t know what I’m talking about! Nanaba and I saw you yesterday with Petra! In the cafeteria! Wow! Sitting too close to her?! You’re even smiling at her, and what the fuck is that? She’s eating and you just tuck her hair on her ear like some fucking lovestruck bullshit?! You even blushed when she laughed, you bastard! Now, tell me! Am I wrong, huh!? Am I fucking wrong?! I may have bad eyesight, but I saw what I saw, Levi!"

For a moment, Levi’s eyes went out of its sockets but upon regaining his composure, he egoistically said, “So, you’re jealous?” Levi smirked, irking Hange more.

“Of all the things I said, that’s your reply, you broom fucker?! And FYI, I’m not! So, let me go so I can punch that grin away from your hand- ugly stinky face!” She tried to escape once more but Levi just tightened his hold around her, drawing her closer than ever but not to the point that she will be hurt. _Damn, why is this shorty so strong?!_

“What’s that again? Hand what? Hmm, four eyes?” Her struggling was halted when Levi suddenly whispered on her lips, cool minty breath brushing against it. Shivering, she cannot help but stared straight at steel blue eyes, electrifying her more than she could take making her eventually break it.

Even if it seems like the man is luring her for whatever bullshit he still has under his sleeves, her stand about this matter still persists. As she said, she had enough.

She will end this now.

With a newfound determination, chocolate pools brimming with courage, she looked at Levi unwaveringly straight and bravely said, “I’m not joking, Levi. Let me go now, physically and figuratively. You have no idea how much I’m hurting in the past weeks with your ignoring and constant absences. I’ll wake up without you. I’ll eat breakfast and dinner with just Sawney and Bean by my side. I’ll go to work without you. I’ll sleep without you. Heck, I even maintained the cleanliness of this house just to make you notice me.” Absentmindedly, a tear streamed down Hange’s face, whimpers filled with pain are now making its appearance, biting her lip at the same time to suppressed it no matter how much of a failure it is. Levi, on one hand, cannot help but wiped away the falling tear but a failure too as it is by the unceasing pouring rain from Hange’s beautiful brown orbs.

Knees and body weakening, Hange leaned her head down to Levi’s shoulders and slowly, faintly, and achingly said, “I still love you, Levi. But honestly, I’m really tired. I think whatever reason you have; I will just accept it and move on. Maybe someday, I will heal, too, and maybe, just maybe, we can be friends again. But for now, Levi… just let me go, please.”

“Are you done now?” Levi whispered in her ear. Ignoring her quivering insides, she just inattentively nodded, “Then it’s my turn.”

_Huh?_

In an instance, Levi unwrapped himself from Hange and stepped away a bit. He buried his hand on one of his pockets, rummaging inside it which makes her curiosity rose suddenly and thereafter reached its peak. Her tongue is now itching to ask something, but it seems like, she doesn’t have to wait longer to have an answer.

Pulling a bright red box, Levi unexpectedly kneeled in front of her. Hange’s lips formed an O, her eyes broadened like the full moon, her body is shaking from the different emotions running inside of her. Anticipation? Anger? Bewilderment? She doesn’t know.

Looking up at her struck expression, Levi started, “This is cheesy as fuck. But just hear me out, Shitty Glasses. Remember that one time when we’re still innocent like a fucking baby, you became obsessed with that red small flower that you would connect just to make a ring out of it? When we’re at that playground, you made me wear one then you showed me yours, saying that matching rings looked good on us. Then I asked how we can have true matching rings? Your smartass said, “We will have to get married, Levi!” That’s so cheesy of you, too, Shitty Glasses. But ever since that day, that lives in my mind rent-free. Maybe you forget about it with all your scientific stuff, but I don’t. I became determined to make it come true. As a matter of fact, I’m still determined now.”

Hange’s cheeks are now thoroughly wet with constantly pouring tears, quivering hands covering her speechless mouth. She doesn’t know if she wants to laugh or shout, her mind is still not completely processing what is happening.

Levi’s still not yet done though.

“So, if you’re going to ask about Petra, the answer is a big fucking no, four eyes. When you saw me did that tucking bullshit, I just helped her because her hair is getting messy as fuck. I blushed? Yeah, I motherfucking blushed because that girl knows I remembered you from her. But what she doesn’t know is no matter how messy she is, I still know someone messier and I love her kind of messy than any other mess out there.”

“And in the past weeks, I’m planning this out. Sorry if I ignored you and don’t pay attention to you, I want this to be perfect so bad that I didn’t know I’m hurting you already. Sorry for not texting you, not eating with you, and not sleeping beside you. Sorry if you feel neglected that makes you question my love for you. Fuck, I love you so much, Hange. I’m very sorry, so fucking much, my four eyes.” Levi said the last lines weakly. He stayed quiet for a few seconds and took a deep breath for what he will say next.

"But just to be clear, I did not do this now to force you to answer me. Nanaba said to me last night, that whatever wish you have after this, I must give it to you – and I agreed. If you think separating is good for us, I- fuck.” Levi looked up and closed his eyes, curbing the tears pleading to come out. _Four eyes, I fucking love you so much._

Swallowing the lump that formed in his throat, he gazed at Hange again, “If you think breaking up with me is good for you, then I... I will let you go. And please, just go now, four eyes.” _Before I changed my mind._

As if a sudden light force was removed from him after, Levi slumped on the floor, head bowed, the hand holding the box is slowly descending. Hange, shock by his dejected state, feels her whole being weakens too.

Sitting down, she scooted closer to the raven-haired man. Her eyes founding what it was looking for her, she reached for it and grab it from the man.

Levi – confused and curious by what Hange is doing – slowly lifts his head up and the sight that welcomed him will forever be painted, tattooed, and etched on his mind.

“Wow, it fits! Levi, look! This is sapphire, right?! It looks so good on me!” Hange excitedly said, eyes looking at the ring on her finger while beaming with joy that he missed. Her beautiful face is now stretched with an equally beautiful smile.

Regaining his composure, Levi lowly called, “Hange…”

“Hmm?” She scooted closer.

_Close enough._

Capturing her face with both of his hands, Levi carefully but eagerly planted his lips on the lips he terribly missed. He didn't waste time for pleasantry though – instantly kissing Hange with an unmatched fervor, passion, combined with love, that he didn't get to release in the weeks they are not together.

_Not close enough._

Transferring his hold from her face down to Hange’s waist, he pulled her up and placed her down his lap. Snaking one arm around her nape, he dragged her down to capture her lips once more – the passion didn’t even diminish one bit.

Lips smashing, tongues clashing, Levi and Hange savor themselves in the heat that they both had been deprived of.

The sight of Levi and Petra is slowly disappearing in Hange’s Levi memory lane; the agonizing doubt is being hidden by the insurmountable love she is feeling for the man she’s kissing. Hange's initial comparison to the woman in the book she just read is also being donned by realizations – they are not similar. But in some way, she learned from it. She might be wrong with her assumptions about her situation, but they are both brave enough to confront the problem hovering above them.

The different images of Hange that he saw yesterday – a drunk Hange who spouted honest words that slowly consumed and woke him up overnight; an impassive Hange who constantly avoided his stares; and the Hange who slapped his hand away and hurriedly distanced herself from him – are now being buried in the deepest depths of his mind, locked away but will never be forgotten. Instead, will be treated as a lesson that he can learn from.

After minutes of thoroughly expressing how much they missed each other, they separated and Hange leaned her forehead on Levi's, both faces are stretched with a smile reserved only for both of them. Opening her eyes, she saw steel blue eyes staring at her, glowing like the ocean gleaming from the sunlight.

“So, what do you want? Beach wedding? Church wedding? Planetarium wedding? Zoo wedding? Or what about a wedding on a mountain cliff? Come on, Levi! Choose now!”

“Tch. The only acceptable options are the first two. And the last one, write that off.”

“What about the Planetarium?! The Zoo?! Just imagine how aesthetically pleasing it is if we will be wed under the stars, shorty! But hmm, the Zoo wedding is cute, too.”

“No, it’s not! Remember that we still need to consider those two chubby cats.”

“Yep! Yep! They will be afraid. But why consider them though, Levi?”

“Tch.”

“Hey, answer me!”

“Shut up. I want them to be- fuck.”

“You want them to be fucking what?”

“Our fucking ring bearers, shitty glasses.”

“What the hell?!” Hange laughed out loud. “They’re cats, Levi! They might just run away in the middle of the ceremony! You freaking abnormal!”

“Look who’s talking. And I can teach them. They listen to me, you know that.”

“Oh, you sure about that?” Hange whispered. “They’re quite angry at you, you know, for hurting me.”

“You have animal bodyguards now, huh?”

“Yep, since I was five.”

“Fuck you.”

“Oh, maybe later, shorty.”

“You better do.”

"But wait, shit, where are my babies?!"

Removing herself from Levi’s lap, she frantically looked around for their two cats, Sawney and Bean. Levi just cannot help but watched her from the floor endearingly and lovingly. Things might have not gone as planned – unknowingly hurting the love of his life in the process – he still loves the result.

Hange is there with him.

Hange will finally marry him.

Hange will forever be with him.

Levi is not wishing for anything anymore.

Hange is enough.

Totally enough.

* * *

**Bonus:**

“Levi?” Lifting her head laying down on Levi’s chest, she called, “I still have a question.”

“Hmm, what is it?” Sitting up, Hange stared straight at Levi’s eyes.

“When you got home last night, umm… I was awake. And I- I smelled something on you that you usually don’t wear. Vanilla? I don’t know if I should be worried. I just want us to start at a clean slate.” She slowly said while tracing her finger on Levi’s naked chest.

His face lit in recognition then softly gazed at her, opening his arms, he stated, “Ahh, that. Come here.”

Scooting closer and laying her head on Levi’s chest again, Hange felt him twirling a strand of her hair, “It’s not that important to me because damn, it’s embarrassing even though it's not me.”

“Just don’t tell this to anyone in the office, okay?” Hange just nodded.

“I went to Erwin’s office and fuck, if you’re there, you will laugh, too.”

“What? Why?”

“I wanted to ask him again for advice about my proposal. That eyebrows always knows the right things to say. When I got there, though, fuck.” Levi laughed a little. “He can kick Mike out of his smell king throne. He looked like a fucking dog sniffing on his wrist too much. He didn’t even notice me entering, four eyes. Then he fucking said, with close eyes at that, “Hmm, vanilla baby, you smell so good.” Fuck you, Erwin!”

Hange and Levi are now laughing their hearts out, happy tears are brimming their eyes.

“Then, I fucking called him because he was creeping me out already. I said, “Wow Erwin. Did you orgasm now? Never thought you’d be a vanilla fucker.” Then, damn, he screamed like a fucking girl and sprayed the perfume at me.”

They had another round of laughter again before Hange cradled Levi’s face between her hands. Levi just leaned to the warmth she’s offering.

“Did some get in your eyes?”

“Nothing. Are you okay now?”

“Hmm. I am. I want to eat, shorty.”

“What do you want to eat?”

Leaning down to Levi’s ear, she huskily whispered. “You, my clean freak.”

“Hmm, better be prepared then, my shitty glasses."

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading this!! Feedback is very much appreciated. 
> 
> I'm on Tumblr too and if you want to talk to me, I'm welcoming y'all. I'm @chili-aux on that site. Thank you again!!!!!!!!


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